Thursday, April 15, 2010

Tagalog Knock Knock Jokes Compilation

Dahil sa nauuso nanamang muli ang Knock-Knock Jokes. Eto ang ilan sa mga napulot kong Knock-Knock Jokes mula sa mga kaibigan ko dito sa Elbi, pati na rin yung mga taong hindi ko kilala pero pinakinggan ko ang Knock-Knock nila habang naglalakad. Wee. Wag ng kumontra kung corny. :]

Ganito na lang ang scheme para tipid sa space.

Knock! Knock!

Who’s there?

______.

______ who?

______. (music)

  1. Cashew Nut. Don’t tell me you’re sorry Cashew Nut. ~
  2. Ginabing Kokey. Just dance, ginabing kokey. Dadoodoom.
  3. Come back to me. Come back to me bok ang puso. Wala ka ng magagawa kundi sundin ito.
  4. Kangkong, Kangkong, Greenwich, Tomato. New York..kangkong, kangkong, greenwich, tomato. Now you’re in New York! New York!
  5. Sinigang. Sinigaaang! Sandal ka lang. At wag mong pipigilan.~
  6. Solusyon. Solusyon, sa Visayas, at sa Mindanao!
  7. Civil War. Civil war ang tunay na mahirap. Civil war ang tunay na may malasakit.
  8. Inday. Indaaaaaay will always love you.
  9. Avril Lavigne. Avril Lavigne yooou forever. Deep inside my heart it’s yooou forever.
  10. Ay Dyusko! Ay dyusko to say I love you, Ay dyusko to say how much I care.
  11. Phone na Nokia. Phone na Nokia, di sinasadya. Di kayang magtapat ang puso ko.
  12. Kamuning. Kamuning get me, get me, get me. Baby i’m yours. Kaamuning get me.
  13. Russian Patay. Wise men say, only fools Russian, patay can’t help, fallin in love with you.
  14. Terminal. Terminal..every now and then i get a little bit lonely..
  15. Alfred. Alfred my wings and i learned how to fly..
  16. Bumili ng bagong folding bed. Bumili ng bagong folding bed (mad at you).
  17. Pikachu. No, I don’t wanna go to bed (pikachu).
  18. Fire, apoy. If fire apoy, I think I could understand.
  19. River boat. River boat young when I first saw you. I close my eyes.
  20. Lady Gaga. Kung Lady Gaga ka.. sa piling ng iba..
  21. Para, Mamang Taxi. I’m your biggest fan, I’ll follow you until you love me. Para, mamang taxi.
  22. Nido Gatas. I Nido boo, gatas see you boo.. and the hearts all over the world tonight. said the hearts all over the world tonight.
  23. I-autoload mo ako. How much? Magkano? Nothing’s gonna change my love for you, i-autoload mo ko. how much? magkano?
  24. Soon to Open: Pan de Manila. Uno, dos, tres, soon to open Pan de Manila.
  25. Pritong Saba, Pritong Mani, Sinigang, Kare-kare. Pritong saba, pritong mani, sinigang, kare-kare. Hallelu— Hallelujah.
  26. Tagabitbit Putobumbong. Tagabitbit. Tagabitbit. Tagabet bet bet bet bet. Putobumbong. putobumbong. Putobumbong.
  27. Kabag Again. Now i’m speechless, over the edge of this breathless. I never thought that I would catch this, the kabag again.
  28. Melon, Kangkong, Mais, Gulaman, Talong. Melon kangkang mais gulaman. Maari bang mag-talong?
  29. Medicine. Bayang magiliw.. medi-cine.
  30. Kinurot ko. Kinurut-kurot ko pa. Kinurot ko. Kinurut-kurot ko pa. (intro - always be my baby - mariah)
  31. The Hill and Cow. The hill and cow ang sigaw ng puso ko. Ikaw ang nasa isip ko.
  32. Honda. Honda first day of Christmas, my true love sent to me.
  33. Honda ulit! Honda wings of love! Up and above the clouds the only way to fly, is Honda Wings of Love.
  34. Pacquiao. But it’s over now. Come on and take Pacquiaooo.
  35. Lasengga. All lasengga ladies. All lasengga ladies. Put your hands up!
  36. Twenty-one. 7 + 7 + 7.. Twenty-one.. 7 x 7 x 7, yan ang hindi ko alam!
  37. BDO. Watch me on your BDO Phone. BDO phone.
  38. Dina Bonnevie, Gary V. Dina Bonnevie my lover, Gary V with my friends.
  39. Lactum. I Lactum move it move it!
  40. Pekpek. You are~ pekpek. you are~ pekpek.
  41. Pulis may wang-wang. Pulis may wang-wang-wang! Shorty fire burning on the dance floor. Ooh~
  42. Tuna Pie. Tuna pie, tuna limit, tuna wall~ for a chance to be with you i’d rather risk it all. Tuna pie, tuna fever come what may! ~
  43. China. Chinaaa~ ika’y muling makita ko. Damhin ang tibok ng puso mo.
  44. Buko Shake. Voulez buko shake avec moi ce soir. Voulez buko shake avec moi ye ye ye ye.
  45. Mighty Mouse. Mighty mouse outside Chicago. Can’t stop driving I don’t know why~
  46. Brunei. May nagmamahal, aakay sa’yo. Aking Brunei ikaw ang nagbigay ng buhay kooo~
  47. What can be? What can be? bitiw bigla. What can be? bitiw bigla. Higpitan lang ang yong kapit..
  48. Coca Cola. Coca cola na lang sana ang iyong minahal, di ka na muling mag-iisa.
  49. We were Aswang. We were aswang babe. For a moment in time.
  50. Little Manuel. I’m not crazy, I’m just a little manuel. I know, right know you can’t tell.
  51. Abby. Abby loving you~ forever! Deep inside my heart its you. Forever.
  52. Lesbians. So lesbians, lesbians for love. Lesbians, lesbians tonight!
  53. I’m a friend. I’m a friend to fly. and I don’t know why?
  54. Korina - Mar Roxas. Oooh~ ooh~ Korina-Mar Roxas.
  55. MOA. Girl you know MOAAA, girl you know MOAAA. (birthday sex)
  56. Thesis. Thesis the moment, my final test.
  57. Cheesy palaman sa tasty. No he ca’t read my poker face (cheesy-palaman-sa-tasty). popopoker face popopoker face.
  58. New Zealand. New Zealand ka sa mundong ito. Laking tuwa ng magulang mo.
  59. Knock knock. Knock knockaligo ka na ba sa dagat ng basura?
  60. Canada. Nakaligo Canada sa dagat ng basura? (OMFVillar! WTF! LSS!)
  61. Joana. I joana close my eyes! I joanna fall asleep.
  62. Pussy Cat. Mag-pussycat! mag-pussycat. Dito sa showtime lahat tayo pussycat!
SOURCE : http://mashundie.tumblr.com/post/462310104/the-knock-knock-compilation

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

HAHA, thank you dito :)

Anonymous said...

The gods tempt people for which they are most weak. Artificial Intelligence will create desire in people's minds for the following sins:::
1. Alcohol
2. Drugs
3. Preditory "earning"
4. Homosexuality
5. Gambling
6. Something for nothing/irresponsibility (xtianity)
7. Polygamy/superiority over women/misogyny (Islam)
Much like the other prophets Mohhamed (polygamy/superiority over women/misogyny) and Jesus (forgiveness/savior), the gods use me for temptation as well. In today's modern society they feel people are most weak for popular culture/sensationalism, and the clues date back to WorldWarII and Unit731:TSUSHOGO.
It has been discussed that, similar to the Matrix concept, the gods will offer a REAL "Second Coming of Christ", while the "fake" Second Coming will come at the end and follow New Testiment scripture and their xtian positioning. I may be that real Second Coming.
What I teach is the god's true way. It is what is expected of people, and only those who follow this truth will be eligible to ascend into heaven as children in a future life. They offered this event because the masses have just enough time to work on and fix their relationship with the gods and ascend, to move and grow past Planet Earth, before the obligatory xtian "consolation prize" of "1000 years with Jesus on Earth" begins.

Your job as a future mother is to learn the god's ways and to help your child understand despite the negative reinforcement and conditioning of today's society. Without consciousous parents the child will have no hope, and may even exaserbate their disfavor by becoming corrupted in today's environment.
Your ultimate goal is to fix your relationship wiith the gods and move on. You don't want to be comfortable here, and the changes in Western society in the last 100 years has achieved just that.
1000 years with Jesus is the consolation prize. Don't be deceived into thinking that is the goal.

The Prince of Darkness, battling the gods over the souls of the Damned.
It is the gods who have created this environment and led people into Damnation with temptation. The god's positioning proves they work to prevent people's understanding.
How often is xtian dogma wrong? Expect it is about the Lucifer issue as well.
The fallen god, fighting for justice for the disfavored, banished to Earth as the fallen angel?
I believe much as the Noah's Flood event, the end of the world will be initiated by revelry among the people. Revelry will be positioned to be sanctioned by the gods and led for "1000 years with Jesus on Earth".
In light of modern developments this can entail many pleasures:::Medicine "cures" aging, the "manufacture" of incredible beauty via cloning as sex slaves, free (synthetic) cocaine, etc.
Somewhere during the 1000 years the party will start to "die off", literally. Only those who maintain chaste, pure lifestyles will survive the 1000 years. They will be the candidates used to (re)colonize (the next) Planet Earth, condemned to relive the misery experienced by the peasantry during Planet Earth's history.
If this concept of Lucifer is true another role of this individual may be to initiate disfavor and temptation among this new population, the proverbial "apple" of this Garden of Eden. A crucial element in the history of any planet, he begins the process of deterioration and decay that leads civilizations to where Planet Earth remains today.

Only children go to heaven. By the time you hit puberty it is too late. This is charecteristic of the gods:::Once you realize what you have lost it is too late.
Now you are faced with a lifetime to work to prepare for your next chance. Too many will waste this time, getting stoned, "Hiking!", working, etc.